30 used to be old

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about "growing up." When I was younger, I thought 30 was so old!!  I couldn't fathom that a person in their thirties still knew the names of singers on the top 40 charts and stayed up past 8:00. Actually, I remember when I thought that a guy over 25 is way too old for me to date. Note: Under 25 is now, for the most part, unacceptable for me to date unless he is way too smart and mature for his age, already a professional with a good career, comes from a wonderful family and has the mentality of a 35 year-old. But I digress...

Not there yet, but in a month and a half, I'll be turning 30 years old!! And to give a little credit to my younger, more naive self, 30 did used to be considered a somewhat "older" age. For example, it was the age by which girls were traditionally expected to be married with at least one kid on the way. Luckily in today's time, 30 really is the new 20.  Thirty-somethings are still partying singles, going back to school, and enjoying crazy late nights out. Actually, as I'm approaching this milestone, I'm realizing that the quality of life you enjoy in your 30's may actually surpass that of your 20-something former self.

I'm more grounded, more financially stable/independent, and kind of "have my shit together."  Plus, I've already gone through the wild, irresponsible phase of life so I can consider many of life's unbearably painful lessons already learned. Well, for the most part anyway... lessons sometimes get re-learned after a night of too many lemon drops.

Why I should look forward to my *gasp* Thirties:

1) Men -- That's right, once your guy friends, boyfriend, and new guys you meet/date are already in their thirties, you can start calling them "men" instead of "boys". Sure, guys never really outgrow laughing at fart jokes and looking at porn. But at least they now do it in private and don't bring it up at the dinner table.

 Boys in their 20's:                   

Men in their 30's:

                   
2) Friends -- By the time you reach your thirties you have probably made and lost quite a few friendships. You've befriended the partier, the debby-downer, the good influence, the bad influence, etc.  But by now, you friendship circle begins to dwindle. People grow, people change, and people invariably drift apart. So now you're left with your core. The people who are still your friends when you hit 30 are probably there for the long haul. You've seen each other through so many ups and downs. You've celebrated each other, fought with each other, yelled at each other, laughed with each other. If you were to ruin these friendships, there's a good chance it probably would already have happened. If a friendship survives the drunken, immature, debauchery of the twenties and comes out intact, it's probably there for life. You can rely on these ones cause they've already seen you at your lowest and stuck around. Don't get me wrong, it's never too late to make new lifelong friends. But it's good to know you have those few bests in your back pocket.

Friends in your 20's:

 

Friends in your 30's:

(Disclaimer: Of course you still party with your friends in your thirties. The pictures represent the foundation of the friendships)

3) Family -- Congratulations! You've been promoted to the adult table at holiday dinner!  Who knew your parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents had personalities??  In your thirties, you're taken seriously enough to be viewed as a real adult and you're let into this world you didn't know existed. Your relatives really become your friends. You get to have a drink with your uncle, spend a night out with your mom. As much as you loved your family before, you get to love them on a whole new level. You love them not only for what they are (mom, grandmother, uncle, aunt, etc.) but for WHO they really are as people. It's awesome!!

4) Life -- You have a job, you have a paycheck, you live on your own, you don't need to ask permission to do anything. You are independent. YAY!!

So here's to the thirties!!! May it be as fun as the twenties, but with less regrets and more awesomeness!! 

(If awesomeness is not a word, it should be)

Happy 9-02-10

Long before Edward vs. Jacob. Long before Finn vs. Puck. Long before Bill vs. Eric. There was...

Dylan McKay vs. Brandon Walsh

If you were a teenage girl in the 90's, Beverly Hills 90210 rocked your world. You wanted to be one of the girls.. Brenda, Kelly, or Donna (or Andrea.. but probably not). And you adored one of the boys.. Brandon or Dylan (or Steve or David Silver.. but probably not).

Brandon Walsh and Dylan McKay. They went to the same high school, had the same friends, both rocked the long sideburns, both wore their hair in the same retro pompadour hairstyle. Yet, there was a clear line drawn. You were either Team Brandon or Team Dylan.

Personally, I was a Dylan girl. It didn't really make sense. Being raised in my family, in my neighborhood, Brandon should have been a shoo-in for the win. After all, he was smart, he had morals, he came from a great, loving family, etc. He was a "Good Guy". And not the good guy with a "good personality" ugly type. He was a really good-looking, going to be successful, best all-around, type of "good guy."

And I did like Brandon... until the moment Dylan McKay showed up on his motorcycle.

"Mad, bad, and dangerous to know," is how Dylan described himself. And he was dead on. He was the rebel, the bad-boy, the guy from a broken home with alcohol and gambling problems who was not nearly as smart as Brandon. He was too cool to care.  Yet somehow, everyone cared. Along with half the viewing audience, both of the lead female characters fell in love with him. He got both girls -- the brunette and the blonde. Brenda AND Kelly.

The Brandon vs. Dylan debate really is much deeper than whether or not Luke Perry or Jason Priestly had better sideburns. It reveals a fundamental truth about girls.You are either hardwired to be drawn to the bad boy or not. Everyone knew you should choose Brandon. It was more an issue of whether or not you could resist Dylan. I don't know whether it's because I had such a sheltered upbringing that I was intrigued by a rougher, rebellious side of life, but I was instantly drawn in by Dylan. And, to be honest, the "bad boy" still attracts me today.

Looking back, I think I even had a whole relationship based on the fact that some guy, who shall remain nameless, completely embodied this Dylan McKay stereotype and I couldn't resist him. He was handsome in that rugged, brooding, James Dean/Luke Perry kind of way. He was reckless and rebellious. He didn't care what anyone thought (sometimes that included me as well). But, he had this way of smiling at you which just made you melt. And he gave you that feeling (just like Dylan) that he just needed some nuturing. That he was this bad boy because he's been hurt and he had abandonment issues and all he needed was love.

However, I've grown up and matured and the "bad boy" I'm attracted to now isn't a true bad boy. Trust me, an alcohol and gambling addiction will send me running for the hills. If you're too cool to care, I won't waste my time caring about you. But, the bad-boy appearance is still irresistible. I still want the excitement of a rebellious nature, the guy who can stick up for me, the guy who doesn't care what others think or say about him, and yes, looking like Luke Perry doesn't hurt either. But, I want my bad boy to be smart and successful. I want him to care and love. I want to know that if I go on a trip to Paris for a summer, he won't start dating my best friend while I'm gone (I'm looking at you, Kelly Taylor). I believe in the best of both worlds -- a Brandon heart on a Dylan motorcycle.